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Reason #257 for why I have anxiety issues

I have to get my mom up and going in like a few minutes. I tried waking her up around 7.  She has an eye doctor appointment and it'll take me a good half hour or more to get there.  She said that she didn't sleep very well so I thought maybe it'll take her about 20 minutes to get up and around.  Nope.  Went back to sleep. She used to work third shift doing factory work so her sleep rhythms are off on top of it.  She said once she worked third shift her sleep never became right.  I heard the same from Harold when he worked third shift.  He's a lazy ass, but I get it.  Sleep is off when you spend some time working while others are sleeping. She wasn't feeling so hot last night.  She thought she was getting a sore throat.  I thought oh no.  I don't know if I can take her getting something like covid a respiratory infection. I'm not mad at her.  I'm so frustrated that a lot of things are left on me to figure out. I'm leaving my pre...
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A Long Long Time Ago

This is one I will delete. When I lived alone, I got my first flat tire.  My car was in the driveway which was good. I wasn't stuck on a road. I thought I got to do something because come Monday, I need to go to work.   I called and left a message for a family member.  I said I didn't know what to do.  I waited awhile, hoping I would get a call back. I didn't. At the time, I found something where I could call the dealership for help.  This was over 20 years ago and they did find me a towing service that could do it.  It took some time but they arrived and changed it. I called my mom while I waited and she said I could have called roadside assistance for help through my insurance company.  I didn't know.  It just never happened to me before.   She asked if I ever got a call back from that family member. I said no.  There was a tendency to erase messages from me.  I was left to fend on my own. Believe it or not, I am capable...
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Spoiler Alert for the Day

I had a flat tire.  That's why the light went on.  The air pressure wasn't low.  It was low in one specific tire though due to the nail that was in it.  Damn. I was driving down National Avenue and I thought why does it sound like something is flapping in the wind?  The grocery store was only blocks away so I thought good time to check.   Yep.  It was the back end of the passenger side.  I managed to find my way through my insurance's road side assistance.  I thought it was going to be an hour before the guy got there so I went in and got kitty litter for the queen.  He was there.  I felt like a dumb ass. Nice kid fixed my tire.  I hate that stupid tiny tire they give you as a spare.  He asked me Am I going to get a new tire right away?  I said Yeah.  Probably Firestone.  He told me about his experiences with getting tires and how people tried to push more on him.  He gave me advice about a couple ...
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Switching up Plans and Knowing when to Follow

Normally I would be dust in the wind by 8:10 this morning.  We went to Walmart this morning on a quest for cheddar bratwurst.  Very Wisconsin.  I was fine that we did our shopping early.  I will go out soon and take care of some errands.  I doubt I'll be walking in this weather.  If I do, it'll be a stroll around the block and back to my car.  We weren't sure about the air quality but it seems to have improved greatly. We did our errands, got our prescriptions and headed home.  There seems to be this little David Spade character at Wal-Mart that seems to be quite the helper when I'm using do it yourself check out.  My mom thinks he has a crush on me. I think he's just a nice person.  Who has a wife.  Newsflash, mom.  Try again.  As hard as it is to believe, some people are just nice. I wanted to drive by the nail salon that looked interesting on the east side. I think it's new so I wanted to see it for myself before I made...
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Had Enough

Glad the week is over.  I think I just had enough. Today, I wished for my own place.  Well a place for me and mom.  And Precious.  I was annoyed when I came back from the store at lunch.  Charlie was home and he was doing yard work. I felt like an intruder when I pulled into the garage.  I hadn't expected him to come out before I got home.  I didn't know what to do. I hated it. I felt like I was the intruder.   He's just awkward and I shouldn't be mad or annoyed. I think he's very shy and doesn't know what to say to either of us.  He talked to my brother in-law. I just joked I accidentally hit a garbage can and I usually hit ours.  He just told me to leave the garage door open.  Like a dad. I can't talk to him about the bath tub.  We're worried about a rent increase and my mom will lose her mind and so will I if we have someone replace that bath tub.  I just wished I lived somewhere else today.  The guys aren't b...
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Smoky but Better Day

Not fun to be part of global warming but here we are with another smoky day.  I went to the store real quick yesterday and had a mask on for the short time I was out.  I feel bad for anyone that has to be outdoors.  This is insane.  I have a feeling it'll be like this for a few days until Monday when we get rain.  Yeah.  I'm tired of upside down world. I hated I had bad feelings this week about someone.  There are some things that would horrify people if I put it all down.  It's complicated and yet, I feel bad when I have those thoughts because I do care. I do love the person. I don't think they want what's best for me.  It's like I said.  Complicated.   I have good hopes for my daily life. I don't think I'll be left on an island like I was before. I don't think I'll feel shamed like I was before.  Despite the diva and Regina, I might not feel the same way like I did before.  I think someone sees with more clarity tha...
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Tough Day on the Emotions

 Well it was more like a tough night on the emotions.  The day went just fine.  It was the night when you think you can relax and you see what's happening in the news. You don't even have to turn on the news.  You can just take a peek at Threads and see what's happening. I'm so sick of the 2020 election lying.  Now two good senators from Georgia are going to be called illegitimate.  Sigh.  I think that just broke me.  When does this stop? I remember that election and getting excited that there was a possibility that Georgia could go to these two really decent humans.  My mom had left me a note that Jon Ossoff's race wasn't called yet but was leaning towards him.  Then we had January 6th to take it away. The first time I ever text banked was for Raphael Warnock's re-election.  I was so excited when they called the race for him.   I'm just tired of lying being acceptable.  It got to me last night.  They flood the z...
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