Lost in Hales Corners

I did not start off my staycation well yesterday.  I wasn't going to go out to the east side in the rain when they warn of flash floods.  I stayed put until about 10:30 and went to the West Milwaukee post office and actually found postcard stamps.  Go figure.

I had a light come on.  Every damn year when the temps dip, the air pressure dips.  I googled where I could get air put in. I wasn't going to drive to Glendale for that with gas so high.  I went to Goodyear on Highway 100 and they were packed.  I found a place farther up the road but I didn't know if they were even open or how to get in.  It looked like it was closed.  

I pulled over in a restaurant parking lot in Hales Corners and googled some more.  I saw that Midas on South 76th Street would do it. I was on Edgerton and I thought I could take it all the way over to South 76th Street.  No, I was wrong.  So wrong.  I was lost in Hales Corners for a minute and it sucked.  I thought what is so great about this part of Milwaukee County?  My mom's former friend lived there and thought we lived in a crime filled neighborhood.  Well Hales Corners reminds me of a scene in a horror movie about a serial killer in the suburbs.  Lots of woods.  No thanks.  

It was nice to get out today for my walk and finish my book.  I felt like I had my momentum and I saw this woman with her dog walking a second time.  I don't know what it was.  She smiled.  I smiled.  I started crying as I walked past.  I cried on my way back to my car and I pulled myself together when I got over to Whole Foods for a return.

I feel silly even admitting this but I feel like losing Precious was such a punch in the heart.  I'm so thankful for Honey Bear.  She's not a replacement for Precious.  She's her own unique self.  I thought maybe the grief would get better and it probably is.  It's just going to take awhile.  I was anxious to get home to see Honey Bear.  

I didn't have kids.  I didn't get married.  Precious was my family and in my heart, still my family. 

Know what it's like when someone grumbles as you're lying in a hospital bed, waiting to get a tumor removed and have them say I spent $300 air fare to get here.  

Yeah.  I know what it's like.  

When I came home that night, I just wanted to see Precious and she was at the door.  She was baffled by me and wondered what was happening.  She was there.

I see a baby teddy bear cat watching me.  She's becoming my shadow and I'm so happy she's here.  

Life is hard.  Cats and dogs do so much for a heart that's too soft for this world.

I love Honey Bear.

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