A Smile that Warmed my Heart

The day after I took Precious for the last vet visit, I was back to my routine.  Some things had changed.  I wasn't stopping to get litter.  I got a few grocery items and then went off to my walk on the east side, still feeling very broken and sad.

I had messed up the condolence card for Josh and I had to get a different card.  I had plenty of discounts (no, I'm not discounting their grief, I'm just stupid with money) so I figured I'd stop at CVS and look for a replacement.  As I was looking, a young dad and his girls were in the aisle and a guy came along with his black labrador.

I love labradors. The Great Fava had a chocolate brown labrador.  Loved Sadie.  Hated the Great Fava.  I got a soft spot for that particular dog and the dog was actually looking at me as they passed.  I just said to the dog, "You're beautiful" and the dog sat down.  I couldn't believe it.  I petted the dog and told he or she that they were wonderful and thanked them.  I really didn't pay much attention to the owner.  At that moment, I had needed for something like that to happen to help me.  That dog was so sweet.

I went on my usual walk. I didn't want to be gone long because I worried about my mom.  As I saw someone coming closer, I noticed it was the guy from CVS and his dog.  I thought oh.  I bet he lives in the neighborhood.  As I walked past, he wouldn't make eye contact and he pulled the dog away as soon as he/she recognized me.

Sigh.  I don't know what that was about.  First up, if he thought I was interested in him, I wasn't.  I didn't even really get a glimpse of him to see what he looked like.  Second, I walked away with my card after I talked to his dog.  I didn't throw myself on his dog and try to keep it.

I thought I'm feeling broken and you got to act like an ass.  Unreal.  

I got to admit, my faith in people got restored yesterday.

I did my usual thing.  I got my walk in and I had to get postcard stamps because I am a political nerd and can seem to only find them at the Shorewood post office.  I mean, there's a couple of other post offices where I've found them but this is closest.

As I was walking up their ramp, I saw people exiting, a guy, a woman with some kids.  The guy that passed me had a nice smile and said hello.  I guess it kind of took me by surprise so I probably had a dumb look on my face when I answered. I thought he seems friendly and had such a nice smile.  I thought he was with the woman and her kids and as I got to the door, I thought was he with anyone?  

I could see grey hair underneath the baseball cap and glasses.  He seemed so familiar to me and I really think Oh my god, do I know this person and I just blanked?  He was kind of handsome.  Unless that was his wife and kids tagging behind him.  Yeah, I turned around and looked and still couldn't figure it out.

Maybe it was a nice stranger.  Maybe it was someone I knew.  If it was, I'm so sorry.  I'm a broken individual who expects nothing these days.  Your kind smile threw me.

It was really nice to see someone that looked at me and smiled.  Stranger or not, it was nice.

Thank you.  I hope I see you again.  I needed that moment.  

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