Feeling Lighter

I felt lighter yesterday and maybe I shouldn't.  No lurker online yesterday.  I felt hopeful yesterday about the situation.  It's been so unbearable busy but I felt lighter.  I felt kind of silly.  I liked the idea of her being out of my life forever.  I like the fact that something was done about a bully.

I was excited when the lurker started and about their experience.  Being in our new world, I met new people online who were helpful and kind, unlike Frick and Frack.  It seemed like maybe this was a better environment for me emotionally and it was.  There was one person who was problematic.  Little did I realize she'd get a friend in the lurker.  Tara the troll is a whole other blog post.

I thought the lurker would have been a great person to work with. I had the years of experience. She had the knowledge for this particular area.  I didn't realize I'd be bullied and belittled in this subtle manner that made it seem like I was the bad person if I said anything.  Little did I realize I wouldn't be the only one.  

We had an account for the state we filed in and we had our own user names and passwords that we had on a sheet for anyone to be able to go in and find a filing if someone was out.  The lurker was using my user name and password to get the information on any filings that got rejected, would refile it and let the attorney know without me knowing.  

I had an incident regarding a charge I had about a court call.  The lurker sent an email to me about not getting alarmed and that she fixed it.  She blamed the vendor.  I wasn't alarmed.  I know mistakes happen and I wasn't upset that my card was used.  It raised an alarm.  I called the vendor and talked to them. I thought maybe because my card was the primary one used for most of these situations, maybe it was just out of habit.  They were very adamant that she said to use my card and then changed her mind.  

See why I don't trust this person?  See how it would make me happy to hear that I no longer have to worry about this?

Still not a fan of the diva or the lurker's friend Regina but I can tolerate it.  I was feeling like a jerk about the diva when our call started this week and she was all smiles. I thought maybe I'm just a crabby bitch.  That may be true!  When I commented on having fun with her granddaughter's event yesterday and then watched the love fest between her and Regina, I thought why do I bother?  She's like the friend that you have who you tell all of your secrets too and she runs to the popular kids, kicking you to the side.  No.  She hurt me.  Repeatedly.  She will do it again.  I have to remind myself not to give her my time or energy.  

When I went to Target yesterday to go buy the essentials we were out of, there was a song that was playing that made me feel kind of light.  I found myself doing my grove dance down the garbage bag aisle to Whatcha gonna do with my loving? by Stephanie Mills.  Considering I had to pick my mom up from the food pantry, I had to get out of my boogie wonderland groove moment and into my Fred Sanford running down the aisles in a hurry to get things done.

It was ok. It was a better day.

The country is still on fire and sigh.  That's a whole other post there.  

Yesterday wasn't so bad.  I am aware of the 125 lives that the lurker has and my Monday could be ruined.  

My Friday the 13th wasn't so bad.

Got to get myself out for the post office run this morning.  Makes me even happier that I won't have to worry about a Lois sighting! 

I hope the good humans have a good day.