Still Wary

It was a better day. I found out from Charlie that they'll be moving on Monday. I thought oh, good.  I'll be working so I won't be in their way.  Then I realized it'll be 95 degrees.  I wouldn't want to move on a day like that.  Stay hydrated guys.  I ran into Charlie's dad and got to see his dad's very cute dog that my mom would like to steal and she hasn't even met her.  Mom loves dogs.  Don't tell Precious.

I reached out to the person I worked with before we all got split up a few years ago.  Even though there were some blessings to be away from the frustrations of office people, new frustrations popped up.  This attorney is a wonderful human being and I wasn't sure if she would respond.  She did.  When I told my mom how she was doing, I burst into tears. I didn't expect that to happen.  I missed her and I was so sad that I can't work for her again. 

She understood.  I would like to say what her name is but I want to protect identities.  I didn't work for her long but she was always so kind to me.  I consider 2019 a horrible year with medical. I felt bad that I kind of had to keep taking off for tests.  She would apologize about setting tasks for me on a certain date.  Lorna was her former person and as much as she liked Lorna, Lorna was very vocal in complaining about anything she did.  Lorna was a pain.  I finally said in an email I'm probably going to have to take off more than I want to because I've had cancer and I keep having to go for tests.  She never said anything but she didn't step away from me or treat me like I was a pariah.  She was nice and she's still nice.  I'm so sad I don't get to deal with her anymore.  

Before I worked for her, there was another attorney who was familiar with what happened and asked if I was doing ok.  I said I'm having a rotten year.  She had asked, I'll call her Sosie if I was ok and Sosie just said she's just got a lot going on.  Yeah.  That makes me want to cry thinking about how she protected me.

She has nice kids.  She had brought her daughter in who was so kind of quiet and sweet.  I know her oldest boy gets into trouble because he hates bullies.  I'm with you, kid.  Mom wants to take the bus to go take care of the bullies with him.  She hadn't told her oldest that her youngest was getting bullied.  I told mom.  She'll be on the bus to go kick some ass for her youngest.  We don't like bullies.  I also don't have bail money and probably not a good idea to have a vision impaired woman on the bus.  Anyway, I'm tired and being ridiculous.

I knew Sosie was also a different faith and was aware of how horribly stupid people were about the whole I want to say Merry Christmas so I would announce I celebrated Kwanza to be annoying.  I basically wanted to slap the Rosh Hashanah out of Frick when she went off about her Jewish co-worker at Walgreens.  

I felt glad that I had reached out to Sosie and heard from her.  I did open up about some of the things that have happened with the lurker without naming names.

I basically got stalked by someone for 2 years.  I think I am still monitored.  I think maybe more so now that I did that write up of a correction.  I don't know if I like this new system and I warned that this can be used as a tool for manipulation or deception.  I am wary and still feel like I'm being watched by them.

I received a message today from the lurker's friend.  We'll call her the Regina.  Regina George from Mean Girls.  I feel like anytime I hear from Regina?  I'm going to get called stupid without being called stupid.  I tried to give Regina a chance and tried not to do guilt by association, but like the lurker, I can't trust them.  I always find something. 

If I'm going to be watched someone, here's who I would like to watch over me.  Could I get a guy, maybe about 5'11 or 6 foot tall to watch over me?  Maybe someone grey haired, a little nerdy in a cool way and with hazel eyes?  Yeah, see my Jerry the dry cleaner reference for that.  I'd like a protector, not a lurker.

Wishful thinking.