Dad's Day

This won't be a woe is me, my dad did bad by me.  No, he didn't.  He made mistakes, but there was a lot I learned from him.

I saw that I had a picture I had posted 10 years ago on Father's Day where he was holding his best friend.  A beer bottle.  Sigh. I can make that joke.  Nobody else can.

Right off the start, I learned that someone can be your dad without being your biological dad.  I never really thought of my biological dad as my bad.  I thought of my step-dad as my dad.  My mom told me a story of how someone said that I looked just like my daddy as a kid. I thought they meant my step dad and I looked up at him and smiled.  I was blonde and blue eyed.  He had a crew cut and dark eyes.  Yeah.  That's not what she meant.  She knew my dad.  I didn't know the difference.  

As a step-dad or any step-parent, there is a role that you take stepping into a family that was already made.  He was mindful of boundaries.  He never trashed my dad.  Once in awhile, he made a sly comment.  He made one to my step-mom that might have gotten him into trouble, but he really stepped aside when it came to those moments.  I hated those moments because that's who was there for me growing up.  Not this other guy and his dumb wife with the big hair.  I get it.  It was about respect.  It was about boundaries.  I love that I learned that from him.

If there was a day I met someone with children, I would follow the same route.  Be respectful.  Understand boundaries.  Be there when you get asked and be there when you're needed.  

I learned from my step-dad that hard work is good work.  It's important to show up and give it your all.  He worked two jobs up until the day that he died.

He taught me that politics matter and it's important to vote.  I was with him when he voted for the last time in 1996.  Is it weird to say he's my inspiration to stay involved with politics?

I definitely got my warped sense of humor from him.  While other kids were bonding with their parents on camping trips or road trips, we bonded over drawing pictures on the JcPenney's catalogs or shifting wigs when we would go to Sears on Mitchell Street on a Sunday.

Yeah.  I have some bad feelings about things that happened growing up and as an adult.  There were mistakes made and I wish he would have done better at times.  It happened. 

He wasn't my step-dad.  He was my dad and I loved him.  I still do. 

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