A Mess Can Distract

It's been a little mess of a day.  It hasn't been horrible, just sorting through the mess of the last month and a half.  

I was good about using sunscreen when I was in the office and when covid hit, it's been erratic. I knew the stuff I had was probably expired so I got a bottle of Cerave from Target.  I got a ton of samples several years ago from my doctor's medical assistant for eczema and it's nice stuff. I didn't realize until I walked out of my last appointment that there were free samples.  That's nice.  Would have felt like a free loader but that's a thoughtful gesture.

I liked the texture of the sunscreen but I forgot about something.  I had stopped at Walmart before I went for my walk and once I got to my spot, I saw myself in the mirror.  I was like a mime with the white cast. I forgot about the damn white cast.  The last stuff I had wasn't that bad.  Normally I can cover that up with a little makeup. I was able to wipe it off but good grief on the mime vibe I was rocking this morning.  Good to protect yourself from the sun and its aging effects, but make sure you don't look like a mime or Joan Crawford in Mommy Dearest.  

When I drove home, my mom called to tell me she was late on paying her Kohl's bill. She just found the bill.  In all the mess that we've had lately, we forgot about that bill.  She hasn't gotten her new card and I tried calling maybe a month and a half ago, but hung up out of frustration. I realize a lot of jobs are being outsourced and I get it.  There was a language understanding that was making it harder for me to explain.  

I strongly suspect our neighbor downstairs got our mail by accident one day and dumped it.  We had some mail missing around that time and we keep finding out things he did that made us wonder if that was a farewell gift.  Jackass.  

I called again and the language barrier wasn't bad but the frustration was still there for me.  They needed to authenticate her identity and asked me to send them her driver's license.  I don't know if this is legitimate but I did it today. It worries me about scams but I got a feeling this is legitimate.  Otherwise, sorry, mom.  I did say to the nice woman, this whole situation is insane.  She probably thought no.  Just the caller is insane.  She wouldn't be wrong!

We did pay her bill in the store and stopped at a Walmart on the way home. I was anxious to get home and just rest.  So grateful for the company but grateful to have a free day to get a little normalcy back.

Now that I can stay, I'd like to go through the boxes I packed and find a place where they belong.  I want to be better organized.  It's a goal I'd like to be better about keeping. I say it, but it doesn't always happen.

I did the scrolling thing today on social media and yeah, that bummed me out.  I'm so thankful for my mom.  There's another part of the whole mom equation that makes me a little sad some years.  If I say it out loud to anyone, I'll hear kids aren't everything!  And yet, they're the same people who would yell at me if I asked for a day off because they want to go to a kids play.  I'll keep my thoughts to myself on that subject.  I feel like I missed out an event in life that makes me feel a little blue some days and it's ok that I feel that. I have every right to feel that way.  It's a valid feeling and I get tired of it getting invalidated.   I hate it when people step on your feelings like they don't count.  

I remind myself, maybe someone missed out on a chance to experience that with me.  

Be kind to people when they share a feeling.  It doesn't give you a right to stomp on it or insert your loud opinion.  Let people feel the feels.