Finding Comfort

I turned on The Big Bang Theory this morning and kept it on as my background noise.  I think I hit Season 7. I like Mayim Bialik's character with Sheldon.  I need a little comfort while I worked. I didn't need to hear about the orange man.

The Ted Danson show just hit me like a ton of bricks.  All of my worries and fears came piling in, thinking about will happen in a couple of months.  I'm sick about Jack Smith actually being prosecuted for doing the right thing.  I'm just so heartbroken about so many things about the election.  The voters who thought it was ok to elect someone like that.  So morally bad and so horrible.  My cousin is upset because she's on Medicaid and she told my mom that she feels like people who voted for him jeopardized her losing benefits.  I've been trying to just go about life and do the best to shield us from the horrible that could happen and it's hard.  I am so tired of seeing that face on a TV screen.

On a plus side, I looked at my credit score and it did another big jump.  I thought wow.  I make my second payment on Sunday.  I don't think I had one of these scores this high for a long time.  It's nice to see.  I just wonder if any of the rates they lowered will go up once someone starts playing lets slap a tariff game.  It was good to see the score.  It was probably the best thing I could have done and should have done it a long time ago.

I guess we won't be eating turkey tomorrow. It's ok.  We'll have it on Sunday.  It's been a long time we had it and my mom realized that it wouldn't thaw out in time.  We stopped at Target and got french fries.  We'll have something like burgers and fries.  My friend Trevor thought I was sad and pitiful because we didn't have turkey most years.  We didn't care.  It was nice to have but it's also nice not to have as well.  Being together is more important.  I'll be wrapping Charlotte's gifts tomorrow.  I will sleep in. I think I need that more than anything.  

I made an appointment today for my next screening in mid-March.  I made it like a few days after my last one.  That really irritated me that I kept getting told that people could learn from me as a cautionary tale.  F them.  I didn't skip for years like some of the women I worked with for years.  Nobody likes to deal with these things but as I told Corinne, if you're good about following up, then if something is wrong, then maybe it won't be so bad if there is something and it can get taken care of right away.  The people who thought I was a cautionary tale were probably the ones standing in Brookfield protesting that they couldn't get a hair cut during Covid.  Freaks.

I made it through the day ok.  I will probably have a million of those freak outs.  I'm just so disappointed in people.  This should really come as no shock, but to realize that it's a reality is a horrible horrible feeling.

Finding the good humans is like sifting for a needle in a haystack.  When you find that good human, wrap them up in bubble wrap and never let them go.  There's not a lot of them.

I hope the good humans are doing better than me and can enjoy some time off.  Maybe the monster and his girlfriend will go away since nobody likes them.

I take my wins where I can get them