First Jehovah Witnesses and now a Stripper

Why do I answer the side door?  I should have looked out the window where I work but my mom said Oh, I bet it's the landlord.  I actually thought it was the mailman. I thought maybe we got a package.  I didn't have one coming but maybe Santa got my letter.

No.  I didn't know who this was but I found out.  Some girl didn't have her cell phone charged and she needed to call an uber but her phone was dead. Could I charge her phone?  She's offering me money and I'm like what is this?  I was just floored.  I agreed to take her phone and charge it.  She offered me money but I said I'll see what I can get charged.  Her phone wasn't compatible with my charger and I said could you use my phone?  I didn't have Uber on my iPhone but I got the app and when she found it, they wanted my credit card number that was saved and I'm like Oh no. I couldn't do that.  

I did have a credit card saved on my phone but guess what?  The card is already locked.  My debit card doesn't need any charges either.  I said why don't we go see the neighbors?  They wouldn't answer the door.  Smart people. I said maybe someone across the street might help.

Here's another thing.  She told me that she lived in the blue house across the alley.  I said Oh, is Byron your neighbor?  He did mention a neighbor that was up all hours.  She said yeah, she didn't think him and his wife liked her because she's a stripper and she works late hours.  She said that her and her boyfriend were throwing stuff at each other one night.

Somehow the monster didn't seem so bad.  She wasn't what I expected for that type of job.  She looked like she would help you at Comic Con or work at a comic book store.  I watch too much of the Big Bang Theory.

Here was the conflict.  She really just seemed like a dumb kid who locked herself out.  How many times have I gotten screwed over?  Too many.  I hate that I brushed her off on other neighbors but I was working and I just didn't have it in me to help her.  I know Byron has complained about a neighbor that lived there and I got a feeling it's her.  I have a feeling there's more to her than I know.

I felt like a jerk for not helping but I felt like I was going to get screwed over.  I got that downstairs.  Byron has a dumb stripper that lives upstairs from him. I have a dumb dick that lives downstairs.  I did see the monster with his dogs and he was trying to walk away from me and I told him that someone was throwing rat poison on people's lawns.  That got his attention.  The funny thing is he treats us like we're the monsters.  We're the enemies.  No, we're not.  We could have had a better relationship and we wanted a better relationship with him but he has chosen repeatedly to do such dirty stuff to both of us.  I did it because he had the dogs with him and Iggy just knew I was in the alley because she zoomed past Leelo and ran to me.  Thanks Iggy.  Tattle tale.  I don't want anything bad to happen to them.  I'm a little eh on the monster but if that's one thing that keeps me to be a little bit of a human?  I can say something.  

My mom cried tonight over the election. She wants to go to Canada and to be honest, it looks kind of good.  I kind of wonder if the polls are just saying it's even because they fear Trump.  Lucky me, he's coming to town the day before my birthday.

How do I get so lucky?  I just don't know.  I'm not answering the door again.  I don't care if they're dropping off Stephen Colbert at my door.  He can send me a text.