New Day

I know.  It shouldn't surprise me when women act the way that they do.  It just disappoints me.  It makes me think Michelle Obama is right.  We're not grown up to have a woman President.  We can't even support each other in the work place.  We have to compete.  We have to be mean to each other.  We just can't be nice.

It gets tiresome after dealing with this for 34 years in the workforce.  I am just tired.  Checked out.  Call me an introvert.  Say that I'm in my shell, blah, blah.  It's all true and blame it on other women.

When Frick had been so ugly towards me - yes, I know, which time?  It was when we got an attorney from Green Bay and it was alleged there was a phone call saying that there was favoritism towards me.  That was not favor getting assigned to that woman. I liked Janice but that woman buried me with work.  Frick was uglier than usual towards me as well as other team members at the time. I think Corinne was the only one I could talk to during that time.  I had a talking to by my manager about me being in my shell and reminded me that they were my friends at one time.

What?  They were never my friends.  We had a friendlier relationship until this happened and was it worth it?  I was quiet and kept to myself.  I had stuck up for Frick in the past when it counted and I got stabbed.  

If someone constantly kicks another person, what do you expect them to do?  Do you expect them to be friends with that person?  Have them get kicked again?  Newsflash.  I kept getting kicked even harder as I tried to make nice with Frick.  That was insulting that I'm the one being called out.  Maybe 6 or 7 years later when Frick was being mean because I got assigned to another attorney, I told my manager that I really try and I'm going to guess that I've been more loyal to Frick than she has been to me.  My manager agreed this time.

I can be cordial with anyone and keep the peace.  Don't expect me to have bonding moments with people who have engaged in cruel behavior.  Don't call someone sensitive when they have been insulted.  I get sick of that gas lighting approach.  Yeah.  I am sensitive.  Am I supposed to take insults all the time from someone?  I might as well go back to selling shoes.  There's a point where you have to say enough is enough.

Sigh.  I have one good female friend and that's all that I need.  I wish I had a friend who lived closer but I've had about 50 different blog posts with that wish.  I don't need to be part of a girl gang. I think I do better with one on one.  Corinne got her birthday package and well, I didn't realize her birthday was 3 days earlier than what I thought it was.  My dad, or step-dad's birthday was the 24th.  Hers is the 21st.  Damn it.  I was close.  At least I got it early!  

I hope the blizzard passes over us. I don't mind snow for a day and staying in.  It was 2 months worth of it that was getting so bad.  I might read a book on my Kindle or clean up my messy desk.

Yesterday, I called my insurance company about what covers weight loss help.  The nutritional part was one aspect and I've done that.  I absolutely hated the woman that I went to years ago.  I know, maybe it's the person.  I felt she was rude about me not cooking.  I should take a cooking class.  

I'd like to learn how to cook.  We have an electric stove and I have a very nervous mother when it comes to these things.  I did try to cook when we lived in Bay View and I wound up having to air out our place one night when I burnt the food.  There's just so many ways to make things, does a stove need to be involved?  We have two air fryers.

No,  I don't want to take another shot, let alone a weight loss shot but I asked.  I keep seeing the pills by Wegovy advertised. No and no.  Unless I had blood sugar issues.  I don't want that to happen.  I was curious.  No, I'm not looking for the easy way out.

I felt bad after I talked to the woman online.  She did give me other information about getting some type of prescription card. I didn't really understand it but I thanked her.  I kind of suspect that Cassie might have had some help with her weight judging from the picture she had online.  Cassie didn't exercise or work out.  When I worked in the office, I would do a light workout before I started.  Then I would walk three laps around the parking lot for my morning break, then one in the afternoon.  I would walk this big hill during my lunch break which was 45 minutes and then walk again when I got home. If the weather was bad, I'd find a workout to do.  If I lost any weight it was a miracle.  Cassie would never do that much exercise so I wondered if she had help.  Good for her if she did, but damn.  Sucks when you're me.  Really.  Nothing is easy.

That's what gets me when I do come across this jealousy or petty comments.  So someone complimented my work?  Shut the front door.  Do you all think I'm excelling in life?  Do you think maybe just maybe someone saying nice to me might be something I need?  I have an aging parent, an aging cat, dealing with my own aging and worried about my health, I'm dealing with debt, fears of rising rent and just feeling alone all the time.  What the hell is there to be jealous of?  

I'm just sick of cruel and petty women.

I'm going to try to have a better day.

I hope the good humans have a good day.