Ghosts, Ghosting

I feel like I'm being haunted by the girl that stole our rent check.  I thought my mom had gotten a paper bill for her life insurance. She did but she showed me that her November payment hadn't shown up.  OH. MY. GAWD.  I spent about 30 minutes on the phone with a rep from the insurance company last month and she authorized the woman to have me speak to her and we paid for November out of my checking account.  Now I know why I'm off $22. I should have double checked.  It didn't show up so I tried to at least pay for November over the phone with the automated service.  At least I got a reference number.  I'm not as diligent as my mom checking on these things and I will be going forward.  That stupid girl just messed us up or maybe me with getting accounts in order.  I hope she has the holiday she deserves.  Rotten person.  

I felt guilty about my bad mood yesterday over the package not being acknowledged by my cousin.  When you've had the month and a half we've had, at least send an email.  Thanks, got the package.  I get depressed about a lot of things too.  Then again, that's me.  I should stop my grumbling.  Next time, it'll be Amazon.  Less stress.  I don't want to mail anything in the mail but I will at lunch time for eBay.  What a mess it's been sorting through this  My mom apologized about it and I said it's not her fault.  It's been stressful for her too.  

Last night, I watched a short documentary special on the filming of Wham's Last Christmas video.  Oh, how I miss George Michael.  He had such a beautiful voice.  It was all the people who filmed the video and who worked with him and Andrew Ridgley.  My stupid ex didn't want to get me his CD because people would think he's gay.  Idiot.  Say it's for your girlfriend and be thankful she worshipped this gay icon.  I have some of George's music downloaded including Last Christmas.  He had just a soulful voice.  Listening to his music, especially the songs from Faith, bring me joy.  

I am still struggling with my daily tasks but I made headway on a couple of things. I don't know what to say because I think I would hear the sound of crickets.  I just hope there's some news shortly that relief is on the way even if it's a small relief.  I'll take anything.  This is too much for anyone.

I found an article from NPR about cancer ghosting this morning.  I definitely had that.  I think that's the hardest thing is being around anyone who might freak out about cancer.  I don't want to be around anyone like that.  It's not my everyday thing or monthly thing like it was.  It was part of my life.  Still something to be concerned about, but after nine years, safe to say that I'm doing ok.  If I'm not, that's part of life. You can't hide from it.  I guess I have no tolerance for people who do that.  It's like good riddance.  I don't need emotional lightweights around me who make it about them all the time.  

Precious actually put her two front paws on my lap last night.  She normally just head buts my leg and plops down beside me. I love my senior cat.  She's already snoring and ready for work.  Me too.

I got a video last night at Charlotte's holiday concert.  Easy to pick out. Little girl shimmying and jumping when everyone is paying attention.  Yeah.  She's one of us.

I hope the good humans have a good day  

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