Last Week in August

It seemed like I felt this crummy last year.  What is it with August that I feel off center?  Is it because I'm a month away from time off?  I don't know.

I wound up watching Below Deck yesterday to let my mind escape from life.  When in doubt, turn to a Bravo show.

I am worried about a phone call I might get from my doctor or staff.  Maybe it's good news.  Maybe it's news that will keep me safe.  There's so much people don't realize when you get a bad health report.  You may recover physically but it's always in the back of your mind emotionally.

I was reading some of the back and forth between Governor Wes Moore and well, you know, that guy.  I know he's going to go after Maryland next.  At least Wes Moore served in the military and didn't need a note for his bone spurs.  I read about Kilmer Abrego being sent to Uganda.  My mom said she never expected things to be this bad with immigration.  I did.  I was hoping my mind was overreacting and it wasn't.  People disappearing and it's not for the reasons we would think. 

I was surprised I slept through the night.  Normally I have one wake up call from my tiny tiger.  She allowed me grace.

I just watched the Jussie Smollett story on Netflix.  I don't know if I necessarily believe him.  I really don't know what to believe after watching that.  I think that's what Netflix wants you to believe that. Everyone just seems in the wrong after watching this.

I am disheartened that when I speak up, I always find myself being accused of being in the wrong.  This is why I'm done saying anything.  I hate that someone who isn't very nice was able to put another mark against my name.  That's not fair.  I'm used to that.  I wonder who the other person was that took things higher.  I kind of knew if I did it would be an all out war and I would wind up bloodied and bruised.  Speaking up just doesn't seem to do anything when it comes to me so I'll go back to staying quiet and look up at the ceiling when I get reported for tiny errors that are ridiculous.  I argued if I'm overwhelmed and struggling and people ignore me when I ask for help, you can't then start picking me apart.  Did it ever occur to people?  Being ignored is just a regular thing for me. 

I had taken tomorrow afternoon off for a hair cut but since I changed that, I will be taking the afternoon off because I need a break from cruel people.  I need a break from liars.  I need a break from the diva. I saw one video that showed her skin care routines because people asked how she looked so young.

It's called face filters, people.  Geezus.  For the love of all that's good and glorious, please don't dance around you in your nightgown on those videos.  OMG.  

I hope the good humans have a good day.  

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