Breaking Out Sunday

I seem to have a case of the scaries lately when I wake up in the middle of the night.  I don't know what's happening but it seems like the last couple of weeks, I feel overly anxious when I get up and just feel scared.

I'm wondering if my blood test has freaked me out more than I realize.  It's not the worst thing to find out I might have a 18% chance of a cancer recurrence.  I know the thought of anything higher than 10% scares me.  I wish I had answers.

I have resorted to sleeping with a night light now.  Precious loves it.  I feel silly that I need a lamp to help me cope.  I took something at 4 to help with anxiety.  I've managed to break up the pills I have in 4s now so it lasts longer and I don't need it to be so strong.  Makes me tired.  I need to function but not feel like I'm on high alert.

In my detective work of viewing the diva's Tik Tok videos earlier this week, she noted she was going on another vacation in October.  Well thank god she can get away from all the stress she causes me.  Sigh.  She's just a spoiled child.  I don't know how that platform works but I think she's getting free stuff or maybe paid a little bit.  

We were feeling relieved that my sister and family wouldn't be coming until mid October.  We were happy to have them in late September but it's the same old problem.  Money.  I realized after she said that I thought oh damn.  I bet I can't get a day off because the diva will be frolicking in Mexico making videos that week.  My sister and husband will be staying at a hotel because they can get a discount thanks to my niece.  It'll just be my nephew and Krackle and Daisy.  Ok, Kringle.  They're usually on the go so they'll be stopping in here and there, but I wouldn't mind spending time with my nephew even if it means watching an afternoon of game shows.  We shall see when the time comes.

I am going to drive by a church that I think might be there.  Corinne asked me about it and now that I know the location, I can find out if it got demolished.  I saw the article but I wasn't familiar with that where it was located.  

Just another morning of getting my steps in, my ShopKicking and doing our usual grocery run.  It'll feel good to get out of the house this morning. I told my mom last night it's not to get away from her, but the home office.  At the office, I had to get out at lunchtime.  Didn't matter if I walked or went to Target or another store.  I needed to get out.  People are so baffled by why I left everyday at lunch.  First up, it was nobody's business. It was my time.  Second, thank me later because chances are, I'll be in a better mood than the rest of you because I got away from all of you for 45 minutes.  We need those breaks in life.

I hope the good humans have a good day. 

I got to go find that hill to walk. 

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