It's Not about the Hair

 I am getting a hair cut tomorrow at the beauty school in downtown Milwaukee.  I have been going there the last year and I'm happy with the results.  And happier with the price.

Last year, when I was going to put poor Precious through diabetes treatment, I was panicked about what I was going to do for money.  Everything was pilling up financially for her treatment and I was going along with it.  The vet had sent medicine to a pharmacy across the street from where I went and got my hair cut and colored.  As I'm feeling overwhelmed, I saw the salon and wondered why the hell do I keep going there? I can't afford them.  I quit.  I cancelled 5 years of appointments on my phone when I got home and said every time in my note "I can't afford you."   Nobody ever called me about what I did.  Not shocked.  It was just my eyes opened up that this was so stupid.

I went there because of my infamous former nail tech and fake friend had me get a hair wash and blow out when I was done with my first appointment with him.  Yeah, that's how he got me.  I was going to the school at the time but I seemed to keep getting stuck with someone that wasn't taking things seriously and after getting hit in the face with a hair dryer by one student, I was open to changing to something new.  I knew it would be more but I thought I could manage.

I wound up disliking the first hair stylist I went.  She did great hair but she was rude.  She called me boring.  I kept coming back.  When I thought about leaving, I got a call that she left.  I thought I'd give it another chance with the next stylist.

I really liked her and she was easy to talk to.  She wasn't gossipy or overly chatty.  She just did great hair.  I liked seeing her for my appointments.  

When I was on leave, I still felt like I got hit by a truck and I told her I had cancer surgery.  She was so kind and so nice to me.  She had emailed me articles about healing and recommended books.  I was so grateful.

I kind of overlooked when she handed me her business card for healing.  She thought I could give the cancer center her business card.  How bad would I have looked doing that?  I took the polite route and said I'd ask one of the nurses about it.  I never did.  I just couldn't.  I thought she's young and doesn't know better.  It was just bad.  

I would say the last couple of years I went, I had little things that bothered me.  I was fine when she went on maternity leave and perfectly ok with going to see someone else while she was out.  The salon picked someone that charged me more than what I paid for her both times.  Then they changed one of my appointment times and pushed it back from 3 to 4 without giving me a call like every 3 months I would get my hair cut and colored on a Tuesday afternoon.  I was ok with it, but once again, just this weird feeling that didn't sit well with me.

I would take longer because she would take a hair cut with me and I think my hair processed longer than it should have.  I wasn't sure.  I was more mad that I had my nail tech or fake friend harassing me and telling me I look beautiful when my hair was fried.  It was all because he wanted me to pay $95 for one of his dumb pedicures.  I'd rather have my half blind mom paint my toenails than go see him. 

When she asked me about him and why I didn't go see him, I thought why is that anyone's business?  I said I can't afford it.  I just didn't think that was really appropriate why I didn't get my nails done.  

And no, she didn't call me when I cancelled.  I didn't expect it.  She can get plenty of customers in that part of town.  She's probably thriving and doing a lot better without the poor working class idiot with her Aveda coupons.  

My hair is just fine going to the beauty school.  I wish they had weekend appointments but I get plenty of enough time to go down there and spend the time.  I am ok with paying for parking.  It's still cheaper than what I was dealing with and I have no one harassing me about getting a flipping pedicure.

The funny thing is that I let my hair grow out and I feel weird asking to have an inch cut off in length.  I have always had short hair so it's nothing to me. I went about 3 months without getting my hair cut last year and in winter weather, I was ok with it.

Nobody understood the whole losing my hair if I had chemo.  They said it's only hair.  That's not the point and I snapped back at someone and said it's another reminder that I have no control over my life.  One more thing getting taken away from me.

I had a lot of breakage issues during the time I took the Zoladex shot and anastrozole.  I had thick hair so it wasn't like I had a ton of bald spots but did it feel weird when I would see an excessive amount of hair in the bath tub after I washed it?  Yeah, it was a little daunting and it's kind of something when the hair stylist student comments how thick and healthy it looks.

Being healthy.  That's what it's about.