Not Okay

 How many ways can your heart feel broken?

I struggled to get through the week.  I found out the one true friend I have is going to move and live a very happy life somewhere else.  I'm struggling with learning some new job responsibilities and I feel like there's someone determined to make me feel inferior.  There's always someone in every group I guess.  

And then there's Uvalde.  I don't always flip the news on while I work, but I did late in the afternoon.

It's nothing new.  Another day, another location.  Children.  10 year old children.  I can't get that out of my head.  

Don Lemon had a woman on that lived in the neighborhood and talked about how she had just moved to the community and people were so nice.  There was a melancholy when she talked.  I just wanted to give her a hug.

Then there were mistakes made.  How can we do that to kids?  How can police stand in the hallway and not do anything? I don't want too many action movies like I used to but when it comes to kids and this situation, wouldn't you do anything in your power to save them over yourself?  I think of the rabbi and the two men that were being held hostage and how the rabbi threw the chair and they ran.  In a time of crisis, we act fast and hope everything turns out.  

It's children, for crying out loud.  Why would they stand around like that?  They're begging on 911.  I think of that little girl who saved herself by wiping blood on her clothes and will now be traumatized by it.

I don't know anything about guns.  I'm so sick of this conversation.  How about we protect this kids better?  Bad enough nothing was done after Newtown.  

I don't forget.  I remember Columbine.  Aurora, Colorado.  Oak Creek.  Tree of Life Synagogue.  Emmanuel Church.  Sandy Hook.  Buffalo.  Uvalde.

It was kind of a rainy day on Wednesday as I listened to the news details. I went out and walked to the post office to buy more stamps.  I signed up to write letters to Texas.  I didn't care about getting wet. I just wanted to do something.  I just feel like I got to do something.

It's just not ok this happened.  It's not ok.  

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