Fair Weather

 There is a friend I have who floats in my life and out like a butterfly.  I don't know if I would define this person was a friend.  Every time I get comfortable with this friend, they wind up floating away.

I met him when he did my nails.  I would occasionally go in the winter and a little bit more in the summer. I love a pedicure.  I really enjoyed this friend's company.  He's just so easy to talk and very warm.  I just loved him and felt bad when we moved away.  We kept in touch through social media off and on.  

I was delighted when he moved back.  He was working at a store near my house and still doing nails on the weekends.  He had mentioned it to me and well I felt a little disloyal about leaving the family neighborhood place I went to once a month.  They are kind people who treated me like family.  I thought this friend was family as well.

I had a really horrible year with medical and faced another surgery.  This friend gave me his number and told me that we should watch out for each other.  If I needed him I could call him.  I was so touched.  He just had his mom, not a lot of family, he had plenty of friends, but I was glad to have another person that I could count on.

He had told me he was probably going to be leaving the salon where he did nails.  He had talked about inviting me to his new place and we could have lunch.  He was worried I was upset that he was leaving.  It wasn't about the nails.  I was happy we could keep up the friendship.

A week later, I got a call from the salon telling me that he left.   I knew it was happening but I thought he'd tell me.  He had hoped it would be a couple of months later.  I was fine when they told me but when I didn't hear from him almost a month and a half later, I felt kind of like an afterthought.  I told him that.  I thought can't you just send a message, hey, pulled the plug early and let's get together sometime?  People spend so much time on social media and yet they can't communicate a proper message to another person.  I did hear from him in that time but it had something to do with a meme.  I thought are you kidding me?  I was pretty terse in my message and he apologized and said he would learn to do better.

I didn't hear from him again.  Then he came back to the salon which was awkward because I get my hair done at the same place.  The pandemic had hit and when I found out he returned, I thought maybe I was at fault.  Maybe I have too many expectations of people.  I texted him and apologized.  He was thrilled to hear from me and we started texting again for awhile.  

After a friend took me to get our nails done at one of the salon's locations, I thought of him and made an appointment.  I hadn't felt comfortable going for a nail appointment and well the prices are high. I have a lot of medical and I regret when i do spend money on myself for stuff like this. I sent him a message maybe a couple of weeks before Easter asking him how he was doing and gave him an update on my crazy neighbor.  I mentioned my appointment in May and was looking forward to seeing him.

I never heard from him.  I saw pictures of him at a basketball game. I saw a meme he posted about checking in on friends because it's Mental Health Awareness month.  Silence.

I did cancel my appointment a couple of weeks ago.  If I see him again, I'll tell him that something came up and that it's nice to see him.

I never want to be an afterthought to anyone.  I'm fine with my own company.  I do have one good friend that will make the time in an emergency or invite me for a nail appointment. I respect the fact that she doesn't have a lot of time and I'm just grateful that she's in my life.

It's not the amount of friends you have in this life, it's the quality of people that are in your life. I choose quality even if it's just me, myself and I.