COVID times

The pandemic really made me feel so disappointed in people and their bad behavior.

I am vaccinated, double boosted and will get another booster in 6 months if I find out that's what is recommended.

First up, I'm not a sheep.  COVID is such an unknown thing that has happened in all of our lives, what's wrong with wanting to protect my health and the health of others?  Is that the definition of a sheep?  Being thoughtful of others?  Wanting everyone to be healthy and safe?

I was excited to get my first shot. I got it at a convention center in downtown Milwaukee.  It was a FEMA dude who gave me my first and second shot. I remember that the first one was from Seattle and the second one was from San Francisco. I thanked both profusely for giving me that secure feeling that things were going to be ok.  I liked my little sticker that I got when I left the center.

I ripped that sticker off as soon as I started hearing people saying "Nobody's going to tell me what to do," or "Dr. Fauci belongs in jail."  What?  What's up with the hate over a little shot?  Do you know what's in a flu shot?  Or your cheeseburger from Burger King?  I didn't know so many people had secret medical degrees.

I've listened to people tell me about how they want their medical freedom and nobody is going to put poison in their arm. I would never push anyone to do something.  It would have been nice if we could have done better with this pandemic and more people got vaccinated, but that's just my thought.

What about my medical freedom?  Or someone who has diabetes?  I saw someone on the news talk about her patient being worried about wearing a mask since a lot of mask mandates are being dropped and that maybe she should wear a pin indicating she has a medical issue because she's had a liver transplant.  No, she shouldn't have to do that!  Why can't others be respectful of the ones that may need to be more rational with where they go and what they do?

I don't go anywhere and nobody invites me places so all I go to are doctor appointments and the hair stylist.  I did for a manicure and pedicure after a friend invited me, but that's the extent of my wildness.  I'm fortunate enough to work at home and if I didn't, I would be worried because I am in the more vulnerable category.

I get tired of wearing a mask.  I've gone into a few places and taken it off when my face is dripping with sweat.  I'm just over all the rules too like everyone else.  Tired of my purse being stuffed with hand sanitizer.

That moment of frustration doesn't last long.  I'm reminded that I'm not working somewhere that requires me to wear a mask.  I'm also high risk and live with another high risk person - my mom.

Early on in the pandemic, I had to call the rescue squad because my mom went limp.  She thought she had a stroke.  It was vertigo and she's fine.  The worst part is that when I followed the ambulance to the hospital and asked the nurses for where she was, they politely gave me a card and escorted me out the door.  I was not getting in.  Nobody was.

I tried calling the number and asked them if someone could call me with an update.  In the meantime, I sat outside the hospital sobbing and scared that maybe I did something and caused my mom to get sick.  We didn't know if she had COVID.  A friend of mine offered to sit with me and I said if I have COVID I put you at risk. I can't have you here.

I was lucky enough to take my mom home.   

I don't hide in my house and stay away from people but I think about what I do and how it can affect others.

I have not forgotten sitting outside that hospital in late June 2020.